From The Archives: I’ve Been Poked In The Face With Stranger Things

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August 12, 2016 by T. Gregory Argall

Many years ago, in the midst of a random discussion covering a variety of topics, a friend of mine uttered the phrase, “I’ve been poked in the face with stranger things.”
Removing it completely from the context of that conversation, I took that sentence and used it as the inspiration for a song. Because why not? That’s the sort of thing I did back then.

 

I’ve Been Poked In The Face With Stranger Things

The restaurant was nice and the food was great.
Things were going quite well for our very first date.
I gazed at her face, her two lovely eyes;
Her petite little nose, and ears just the right size.
 
She had a beautiful smile, but a bit of food on her lip;
Some ketchup, or mustard, or stew.
I reached over to wipe the shmutz from her mouth;
It seemed the gentlemanly thing to do.
 
But she turned her head as my hand drew near;
And my finger jammed right up her nose.
I froze in fear and I froze in shock;
And, embarrassed, I totally froze.
 
But she laughed and shrugged and pulled back her head;
As my finger popped out, she smiled and said,
 
“I’ve been poked in the face with stranger things;
Had weirder stuff stuck in my eye.
I’ve had random items shoved in my ear;
But I’m not gonna tell you why.”
 
It seemed an odd thing to say, but it saved me from shame;
Maybe a rare sports mishap, or childhood game.
But the evening went on and we forgot my faux pas
Until we went dancing and my knee hit her jaw.
 
I jumped back in shock as blood flew from her mouth;
As she fell I heard the screaming begin.
But she just searched on the floor to find her lost tooth;
Then smiled a broken grin.
 
And said,
“I’ve been poked in the face with stranger things;
Had weirder stuff stuck in my eye.
I’ve had random items shoved in my ear;
But I’m not gonna tell you why.”
 
She shook off the pain, said, “Let’s dance, again.”
But suggested I just take her home.
The walk to my car was not very far;
But I wished I was padded with foam.
We got to her place and I took her inside;
Being careful not to bump her head.
One thing led to another and I guess she recovered;
Because soon we were in her bed.
 
It was a beautiful thing, I’ll say only that;
Come the morning, I made her breakfast in bed.
But as I brought in the tray, I stumbled and fell
and >ahem< part of me hit the side of her head.
 
From between my belly and a pillow, there came a soft giggle;
And as she spoke, that same part of me wiggled.
 
She said,
“I’ve been poked in the face with stranger things;
Had weirder stuff stuck in my eye.
But I’ve never had one of those in my ear;
And now I guess I know why.”
 
 
Try to be nice to each other.
tga
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