February 12, 2016 by T. Gregory Argall
Do you ever feel overwhelmed?
Are you occasionally underwhelmed?
Do you struggle with a general sense of whelmness?
Well, now you have an alternative. BETAFLOMABNOSIL.
At last your struggle is finally maybe over perhaps.
BETAFLOMABNOSIL is a topical ointment suppository caplet developed specifically for vagueness in marketing.
Talk to your doctor about BETAFLOMABNOSIL. You may be surprised with what you hear.
BETAFLOMABNOSIL is not for everyone.
Do not take BETAFLOMABNOSIL if you …
…are nursing; are pregnant or plan to become pregnant or can spell “pregnant;” have kidneys; have ever experienced dizziness after spinning for several minutes or dropping from an airplane; have ever attended a Pablo Cruise concert; died recently; have ever seen Bigfoot; have ever read a book; have ever written a book; have ever seen a book; are named Murray; are an adult or plan to become an adult; like piña coladas and getting caught in the rain; have knuckles; know anyone who has knuckles; are human or have ever been human; breathe.
Possible side effects of BETAFLOMABNOSIL may include: slight blueness around the mouth, renal humming, ventricular myopia, audible squinting, yodel intolerance, lack of rhythm, inverted penis, respiratory displacement, Nickelback, thumb reversal, dusty urine, colon exhibition, droopy ears, toe tapping, nipple implosion, bilingual blinking, peeling eyeballs, nasal rash, cheerful dysfunction, exploding blood, auto-tuning, testicular juggling, spelling bee, argumentative warts, lingering uptown funk, bleeding hair, joint flimsiness, vaginal whistling, severe walking, wistful hunger, repetitive death, and mild itching.
See our ad in Don’teventhinkit Magazine and try to be nice to each other.